can you tell me why you have been so sad?

inspiration is a bitch. why does she spurn me so? why does she turn me into the creepy ex-boyfriend, lurking around corners for the chance to jump out and get just a moment to talk to her, just a moment to convice her to take me back. obviously, i've done something horrible to make her push me out of her life. but i don't understand what it was. i want nothing more than to treat her like a lady, to handle her with the respect she deserves. i've tried so hard to convince her to come back to me, but she persists- she leaves no doubt as to how unattainable she is. we were great together, once upon a time. we spent quality time together and the results were nothing short of magical. btu that was then and this is now. now, she's a bitter ex-lover, going around with scores of other guys, making it clear that she has moved on. sometimes, she taunts me with it, laughing as she frolics about in skimpy little outfits. she teases me by showing me everything i can't have. other times, she ignores me completely, turning a cold shoulder as soon as i get near her. i've never used her or abused her. i was always gentle, loving, and appreciative of the gifts she gave me. i didn't push her or pressure her. i took what she gave with open arms, open heart, and open mind. so why does she cringe at the prospect of my touch? why does she treat me with such disdain? what more can i do? i'm beginning to feel like the crazy, obsessive ex-boyfriend because i don't understand why i can't have her but other people can. other people treat her like a cheap commodity, something that comes around all the time. but i know the truth. i know how precious she is. it isn't everyday that you find a gem like her, and yet she won't let me cherish her. why do you hate me, inspiration? why?